Points to note when you come out
I hope you'll be okay if you come out tomorrow. Conversely, those who want to come outhere
Many people don't have any LGBT friends or acquaintances, so it would be a surprise if they suddenly appeared in front of you. What's more, if someone you know well is LGBT, you may feel confused, like you've been deceived, or you're sorry that you didn't realize it until now. Also, because you don't have knowledge, you may hurt the other person with a quick word. Let's take a look at LGBT experiences.
・Even though I summoned up the courage to say it, I was laughed at and said, "Stop joking!"
・I was at a loss for words at first, but I was happy that he listened to me until the end.
・I was relieved when he said, "It's okay, you're just you."
・When I came out to two of my friends, one of my friends commented, "Don't attack me!" I'm glad you posted a tsukkomi.
・Will it be pulled? I thought, "What kind of person is your type?" "Do you want to get married?"
Based on LGBT experiences, please be aware of the following.
1. Don't change the subject immediately because you don't know how to react.
Calm down, swallow your words, and listen to what the other person has to say.
2. Admit that you are biased.
If you feel uncomfortable after coming out, don't want to hear such stories, and feel uncomfortable, please realize that you have prejudice against LGBT. We live in a society where LGBT people are seen as abnormal, so it's not strange to have prejudices. First of all, admit that you have prejudices, think about why you think so, and what you can do about it.
3. Even though you haven't confessed "I like you", if you're gay, you should be romantically interested in yourself, who is the same sex! Don't get me wrong.
It's one thing to come out as LGBT and say you like someone. If someone explicitly confesses that he likes you, it's okay to refuse, just as you would when someone of the opposite sex you don't like confesses.
[Important] 4. Do not talk about the person to others without permission.
Maybe you mustered up the courage to come out to someone you trust. However, arbitrarily spreading the word is an act that hurts the other person very much. Imagine and handle when you tell someone a story that requires courage.
5. If there is something you want to ask, listen honestly.
The fact that you came out is proof that you want to continue to be friends. If you want to ask a question, you can preface it by saying, "This might be a rude question," or "I might be biased," or "This is how it works in my case." It is also transmitted, and the dialogue is smooth.
6. Pay attention to how you call yourself and your lover.
If the person says, "Body is a man, but mind is a woman," then "she" is the correct pronoun. But don't use "she" or "him", just call them by name.
Also, when it comes to how you call your lover, you can definitely imitate what they call you. For example, "boyfriend", "girlfriend", "lover", "partner", "mother", "companion", and "husband" and "wife" in the case of same-sex marriages in other countries.
7. Get used to coming out and being caught.
Those who come out are usually ready. However, the one who is done is sudden. Therefore, it is unlikely that you will be able to respond well without preparation. In such a case, please try to interact with that person again on another day. "It happened the other day, but I was so happy that you said it, even though it was so sudden that I couldn't express my feelings."
In doing so, your everyday attitude towards LGBT people will change, and you will be kicked out by others. And then you get used to it.
Be a supporter of each other
In a society where there is still prejudice and discrimination against LGBT people, there are risks involved in opening up about this. I came out to you in such a situation because you are trusted. Please help spread positive messages about LGBT for the sake of that person and other LGBT who are unable to come out.
It's also a good time to talk about your own minority. In fact, it can even be a come-out competition where secrets are shared. Rather than a one-sided relationship of “helping and being helped,” it would be nice if we could share each other’s concerns and become good supporters.
●There are groups that you can join even if you are not an LGBT person! Welcome.
You can chat on QWRC day and night.
G-FRONT Kansai also holds casual meetings.
NPO LGBT Family and Friends Association
●For you to live freely
Encountering various ways of life enriches your own life. Meeting LGBT people will surely free you from stereotypes and give you new ways of thinking. For your own sake, be tolerant of different ways of living.
Revised 2019/10/05
2014/01/25